Safe (and Enjoyable) Sex in Your Middle Years
STDs are on the rise, especially among 45-64 year olds. In fact, Syphilis and chlamydia cases tripled in this age group between 2000-2010. Syphilis is particularly concerning because it can lay dormant for awhile but if it goes untreated, it can lead to more serious consequences including blindness, paralysis, and even death.
Recent reports confirm that cases of syphilis, chlamydia and gonorrhea have all doubled or tripled in the past decade. They attribute the rise to the fact that the “love generation” that began being sexually active has stayed that way.
Divorce has increased and they tie the increase in certain STDs to the arrival of Viagra, allowing more men to remain active sexually longer.
In addition to the “treatable” forms of sexually transmitted disease, there are many STDs that cannot be “cured,” but they can be managed very well with medications or lifestyle and dietary interventions, so that you can live with them. Examples of these types include herpes, HPV, and genital warts. In addition, HIV remains a concern, as cases of HIV among patients over 50 have doubled recently. HIV’s minor symptoms may appear in weeks but it can take up to ten years for more serious symptoms to develop. The symptoms that appear earlier may seem like those associated with aging such as lack of energy, short term memory loss, headaches, loss of appetite or cramps and so many go undiagnosed in older patients.
10% of new HIV cases are being diagnosed among the over 50 crowd and the CDC blames this rise on older Americans not understanding the need for condoms and health care practitioners not educating older patients about the risks of unprotected sex. The good news is that getting screened and using a condom until you are sure you and your partner are healthy can prevent this.
Condoms – How Effective Are They?
While STDs cannot be completely prevented, studies show that latex condoms, when used correctly, are your best protection against HIV, gonorrhea, chlamydia and trichomonas. But the key is that you have to put them on prior to contact or penetration. Even then, they are not fool proof.
According to Dr. Cheryl Gibson, the Medical Director of Planned Parenthood of Northern New England, “Contraceptive Technology states the effectiveness of condoms for contraception at 88% in typical use and 97% in perfect use. For STD prevention…we generally quote a greater than 90% chance of reduction.”
At Women to Women, we believe using a condom is the best strategy unless and until you have both been screened and committed to a monogamous relationship. And because HIV may not be detectable for six months, that means using condoms until you know you are healthy.
They are not perfect or foolproof – they can break and they need to be used correctly and before contact. They also only cover part of the genital area and warts and HPV can still be present. But they remain our best line of defense.
We recommend that women take control and buy their own stash of condoms and keep them handy. That means in your purse, your car, your briefcase, your gym bag – make sure they are accessible anytime, anywhere so there are no excuses!
In this day and age, safe sex empowers women – choose your own flavors, colors, textures and have some fun taking control of your own sexual health and safety. If he won’t wear one, you will want to seriously question whether this is a good relationship for you. After all, is risking your own health worth it for a man who doesn’t seem concerned about yours?
And one important tip: Remember that condoms have expiration dates – so check and make sure they have not expired before use!
Immune Health and STDs – What You Can Do To Reduce STD Risk
In addition to using condoms, there are a few other things we can do to minimize our risk of exposure to sexually transmitted diseases at midlife. You may not realize that improving your immune system can boost your sexual health as well!